Storytime at the Valley Library = Epic Fail:(

Last summer, I blogged about my feelings of being a member of the "Valley Pool". I felt it was snobby, small-minded, and full of moms in designer bathing suits who basically did not talk to outsiders (aka me.) The main reason I declined to join the pool this summer (aside from the heavy pricetag) was that I didn't enjoy the uncomfortable feeling I had everytime I went there.

That "uncomfortable feeling" was revisited yesterday...I don't know how it is possible to be 31 years of age and still be made to feel like you are a total loser trying to sit at the popular kids' table at lunch...but that is how I felt yesterday. And if that weren't bad enough, I then wrestled with the feelings of BAD MOMMY and PARENTING FAILURE and DISAPOINTMENT IN MY CHILD EVEN THOUGH I MIGHT HAVE EXPECTED TOO MUCH OF HIM. Here's a run down...

1. Joined story class at the White Haven Library this summer. Loved it. The atmosphere, the friendly people (both parents and library-goers and employees). Gabey did well.

2. Decided that I wanted to start attending the storytime class at the Valley Library for many reasons...it is only 5 minutes from my house, and I'm already driving to White Haven (20 miles) one to two other days a week, for nursery school and sometimes a playdate. Also, I figure it will give Gabe and I a chance to meet some people who live in the "valley" and who will most likely be in the same preschool and elementary school.

3. Sign up for class 2 weeks ago. Line is long as there is a waiting list to get into storytime. Feel a little insecure in line as all moms know each other, are dressed impeccably, and no one makes eye contact or returns a smile.

4. Yesterday--first library class. Show up a bit early, around 1:05pm (class starts in 10 min). Watch as the other moms file in, offer up a smile and say hello, to both the moms and kids. Am a little taken back by the lack of response from the moms. I feel eyes on me, and experience sidelong glances with tight quick smiles. Not fun. WTF?? I think that I am a pretty friendly and approachable person, and generally, moms tend to be friendly with other moms. I have heard and red about snobby moms...but this is my first experience with them (other than the pool...and yes, these are the same women.)

5. Class starts. All the other children run to sit in a circle with their moms...Gabey decides he'd rather run rampant in the library. I coax him gently to sit on my lap by allowing him to bring a train book along. While the storylady gives a welcoming speech and all the kids stare at her, entranced with big smiles on their faces, my little angel proceeds to flip haphazardly through his book, shouting TRAIN! OH NO! CHOOO CHOOO!

6. Haphazard page turning turns into haphazard page ripping.

7. Each child is invited 1 by 1 to come up and put a felt magnet thing on the board. They each do this with glee and run back to their skinny moms, hugging them with joy. Gabe stomps up, puts his little felt spider on the board, and turns to the lady and demands, ONE MORE? The lady says "No, no everybody gets just one." Gabey says, more insistently, ONE MORE??? I get up and lead him back to my lap, despite his protests.

8. As storytime proceeds, Gabey's behavior gets progressively worse. He is not listening AT ALL. He doesn't want to sit on my lap. He wants to walk all over. Literally, every other one of the 10 kids is sitting in their mom's (and in one case, dad's) lap. I then decide to let him have some stuff out of my purse to occupy him. I'm afraid to offer him his juice or a snack, since no one else is eating or drinking. I give him a little train, and he is occupied for 2 seconds before the boy next to us takes it out of his hands. Gabey screams, the boy gives the train to his mom and she roughly gives it back to me with, dare I say, a glare. Clearly toys are unnacceptable for storytime.

9. More screaming. I take Gabey outside (as was stated in the rules) and seriously feel tears in my eyes. I just want to ask him, "Why???? Why today of all days???" I see through the window that the stories have ended and crafts have begun. We go back in and, I kid you not, they had set up one too few craft stations, so guess who didn't get one? I walked around the table carrying my screeching and wriggling child and feeling like the kid who wasn't invited to a birthday party. Finally the storytime lady notices and makes a spot for us.

10. Craft is stringing beads and macronis on a string to make a necklace. Gabe yells, 'RONI! and proceeds to try and eat hard pieces of dyed pasta. All the moms talk about their vacations and happily help their kids string beads. I suppose at this point there was some unruliness from other children, but none in the form of screaming or eating the beads.

11. I finish my freaking pasta necklace as fast as I can and take the destroyed book to the desk. Library lady #2 offers me the first friendly smile of the day and points out that the book was a gently used donated one, and says that I can have it, no problem.

And so we leave, me, my hellian, a lame pasta necklace and a destroyed train book. I don't ever, ever want to go back. But...since this will most likely not be my last interaction with these women, so I feel I must at LEAST go again one more time. And hope and pray that Gabey isn't the uncontrollable monster that he was yesterday!!